Super painful eyes infection again. I'm not sure why, But I always handle my contact lens with care, why do I have eyes infection again? And it was aggravated by my crying yesterdsy during the sermon.

Yesterday's speaker was a prophet who could prophesize things which were quiet accurate. He prophesize for me. There are things which he said that I don't understand. There were 3 things he said about me.

Firstly , he said he knows I had been through a lot these 2 years and I have to learn to forgive people who had hurt me in the past. Well, the first part was true. Since junior college , I had been distancing myself from everything, putting all my focuses on studies. I was under extreme stress back then. For the 2nd part , I did not really understand. Forgiveness? Have I not forgiven anyone? After the service, I went to ask him about it. At first, he bought up child abuse. It stumbled me because I have a stable family since young and everything was a bliss for me. Then he said it could be that friends had taken "advantage " of me and as time goes by, I feel numbed and had taken things as it is , that there is really nothing I can change. Well, I guess that was true. Sometimes, i just feel so taken for granted. When people have problems , they will come to me, when their problems are solved, I became the lowest of their piorities. Sometimes,I can be judgmental and rely on past experiences that people who come to me will not change even if I give them advice , and often I am proven true. I am quite sick of people dwelling in the past. It pissed me off why they can't just snapped out of their misery. Life is short. Why are people just troubled about worldly things?

2) The second thing was which he prophesized for me was that there was something personal about me which I feel that there was no chance of turning back. I need to learn to let go and have confidence that God will be able to take away the thoughts which will come back and haunt me every now and then.

3) Thirdly, he said that I am an encourager to people around me. And I have a gift of praying for people who had been hurt or feel empty or even unworthy inside. I have to learn to use it to bless the people around me.

In the next 3 weeks , he wants me to really to reach out to God so that I can have complete healing in terms of physical , emotional and spiritual.

I have faith that after 3 weeks , I will be a brand new me.